I Hate Buying Shit

Confessions (and tips) from a former shopaholic-turned-sustainability queen.

“I can tell you didn’t come from money,” the girl with a red mullet said ever so casually, glancing over at me. I had met her hours before as a friend’s friend; she puffed on her American Spirit after a split second, half-smoked out nub in her dainty hands adorned with silver rusted rings. We sat in the outdoor patio of a West Hollywood vodka bar on a cool February evening.

“Well, you know. I’m an immigrant. We were taught to use things till their last breath and to be resourceful,” I said in defense, aghast at the shocking statement that was just spat to me. Was this because I told her my Coach purse was from my local Buy Nothing group? Or was it when I refused her buying me a drink out of sheer overly-politeness, even when she assured me it’s soooo okay, she has a job and she has money.

I (try not to) shop til I drop now. Sorry Blair.

First off, I hope nobody ever has the loss of tact to say something of the like to you. However, the privileged read I was just served in my lap got me thinking. I was raised by the most loving of parents who just so happened to know every which way to scrap by, use what they had and make shit last. That meant no cable (yes I’m a PBS kid), community center playgrounds, and reduce re-use recycle (rinse and repeat). I guess you can say my obsession with upcycling food jars began with my childhood.

This week, our administration decided to enact additional tariffs in place (now on hold? the emotional whiplash of it all) for certain imported goods. Our daily groceries and necessities are about to skyrocket some more, and a good majority of this country is about to feel this ache in our pocketbooks and sides.

We’re paying so much on not owning anything, from renting apartments to streaming services. Shopping our worries away with outrageous Target and TJ Maxx trips and mindlessly throwing things away is surely not the solution to assuage our sorrows, TikTok hauls be damned.

Is this heaven or hell, I can’t tell.

As a former shopaholic of blow-out sales and fast-fashion stores, I’ve worked consciously the last few years to re-evaluate my relationship with good old cash. A 70% discount back in the day would get my heartbeat racing and my cheeks flustered.

Nowadays, I’m focused on being as eco-friendly and spend-conscious as I can be. A few simple tweaks have helped me get by and re-use what I have, which makes me appreciate all that is within my scope so much more. In this practice, I’ve also found community.

Below, some manageable tips to get by and start rethinking your overconsumption into sustainable spending habits:

1. Repurpose your jars and candle holders. Yes, I’m starting with this one. I am obsessed with jars. They’ve served me well as storage for food or supplies, vases, drinking vessels, containers, trinket holders, and more. I’ve meal prepped soups and salads with them as a quick tupperware moment, or my favorite is using old pasta jars for a big, giant glass of homemade iced coffee with a cool metal straw.

   

   Liquid IV in a pasta jar, who am I.

2. Make your own cleaning supplies like

   Nicole Sosebee
   . Did you know a solution of half white distilled vinegar, half water and some drops of your favorite essential oils can clean most surfaces? Bonus is that it’s eco-friendly and non-toxic. I personally have a cute glass spray bottle ($3!) sitting next to my kitchen sink ready to go for a spill.

3. Grow your own food (herbs count) like

   The Ivy Cottages
   . Listen, I live in a New York apartment. Critters and lack of outdoor space is a big limiting factor in raising your own food. But even taking the end bits from scallions and sticking them in a jar of water by the sink counts, and you’ll see fresh scallions sprouting in no time. Herbs are an easy way to start - trust me, I’ve barely got a green thumb.

   For any food scraps, I stick them in the compost bin in my fridge, and take it to the local composting tub on the corner of my block every week.

4. Learn to sew like

   Garbie
   and get rid of stains. This is a big one that’s saved me tons of money on impulse shopping. I’ve fixed up old shirts with mini tears, sewed up hems of crop tops and felt a sense of pride in repairing what I already own. You can even get creative and make your own new clothes with free online patterns.

   Getting rid of stains (try soaking them in baking soda and water, hydrogen peroxide or lemon juice before a wash) also helps your garments look brighter after multiple wears.

5. Shop your closet like

   Kimberly Bacso
   (that includes accessories). Again, we love purchasing secondhand, but when that becomes an addiction, that’s not exactly renewability either. Pull out all the garb you own and be honest with yourself in what you’ll wear. Donate the ones you haven’t donned in a few seasons, and look to really dress in the pieces you have left. It’s not about a basic capsule wardrobe; it’s about tailoring it (ha) to your distinctive style.

   

   Cleaning out your closet can be a fun girly activity with friends!

6. When it is time to buy, purchase secondhand like

   Laura Peruchi
   or invest in quality products. Listen, we all have to get new shit here and there when stuff ends up falling apart. Some items are great thrifted - a vintage coat, designer boots, unique home decor. When procuring something like an everyday purse or even stainless steel cookware, make sure you spend that extra bit of money on quality (ideally at a small business), so it lasts. Listen, I try to cheap out and get the least expensive product as a way out, but it will crap out so fast that I’ll need to secure another one. As they say, the poor man pays twice. So bite the bullet and really invest when needed.

7. Join your local buy-nothing group like

   David Azrael
   . Lo and behold, Facebook still has a purpose. FB marketplace is great for used gems, especially for furniture, but the real star of the show are the neighborhood “buy-nothing” groups. You can list what you’re purging, and someone from the neighborhood will claim and pick it up. You can also obtain goods from others (for free) that you may be on the lookout for.

   I’ve found plenty of appliances, new (to me) clothes and books this way, and also returned the favor. It cultivates community and has really been an amusing browse to see what people are getting rid of (some of the most interesting include contraception and an oversupply of breast milk… to each their own).

8. Embrace physical media and look to your local library. Look, we are all sick and tired of screens - this has been reiterated to death. So start reading or writing or drawing and go to your local library. Again, community community community. Libraries have been supporting a diverse array of members forever. My parents and I would attend children’s reading circles or English classes when we first moved to America. I’d browse the magazines section and do history homework as a teen, and now, I am avidly requesting books from the catalog again. Nothing beats the thrill of having your book on hold finally being ready to checkout!

   

   Speaking for itself.

9. Evaluate your spending habits every few months and make sure they match your values like

   Shira Gill
   . This has been really crucial for me to see where my money really goes. I also engage in no-buy days for gratitude and resets once a week. Sometimes I slip up and get a coffee, but that’s okay. What’s key here is the mindset shift behind it. Seeing how intentional I have been with what and how I fork out my dollars have been pivotal in my ambitions toward unlearning hyper-consumerism.

This has been a long one, but what are some of your favorite ways of anti-buying shit? LMK - I’m curious if you’ve been doing something that I haven’t thought of yet!